Wednesday, January 20, 2010

The Meddlesome Gods #1 - The Grinning God

So I thought I'd translate a book of short stories that I'm reading. They're by Shinichi Hoshi, a pioneer in the field of what's called "the short-short story". It's only 4 pages long. I might do another one from the book later. Enjoy!

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The Grinning God

Once upon a time, there existed a small village somewhere. The lives of the villagers were uneventful. To one and all, it was neither good, nor bad.

And so, in the village there lived a man. "No matter what I do, I'll never be rich", he said as he passed the time. However, this wasn't because he was lazy. In short, he had a half-hopeful, half-resigned frame of mind. No different from anyone else, everyday he simply continued his work in the fields.

However, one day, as the man casually struck the riverbank with his hoe, he met a strange resistance. Seized by curiosity, he dug it out and washed it, only to find a small, wooden figure. As he stared at it, he mumbled to himself, "What's this boring thing? No matter how you look at it, it doesn't seem like it'll sell well. Maybe I'll just use it as kindling. Even so, it does have a bizarre face."

The figure looked as if it were grinning. Had it been an austere or a virtuous face, it might have made for a better story and he might have been able to sell it. But with that innocent, joyful face, it was hopeless.

Just then, a voice spoke from somewhere.

"How impertinent. Saying that you're going to make me into kindling, and that I have a bizarre face..."

The man blinked and then looked around him. There wasn't a soul around. From the content of the remark, it seemed to be referring to him. Moving his eyes to the statue in his hand, the voice spoke again.

"Yup. That's me speaking."

"I'm shocked. That a wooden carving like this spoke...."

"You could say that I'm just taking shelter in this figure, that this figure is an my incarnation. In other words, I am the figure, and the figure is me."

"I don't really understand that, but I do understand that you seem to be a figure. Still, what in the world are you?"

"I'm a god."

The man replied with suspicion, "Sure, it's convenient for you to assert that you're a god given the situation, but a wooden carving like this..."

"What a fool. If I was an ordinary wooden carving, and if I'd been buried in the dirt for such a long time, wouldn't I have rotted? Try putting me on the fire. I'll never burn. Proof that I'm a god."

If you put it that way, it might be true. Just as the man nodded in agreement, his lifelong wish came to mind. Maybe it could be granted. Even if it's a hopeless endeavor, I'll be none the worse for it. There's value in trying.

The man took the figure home and enshrined it in his home's alcove. Then, he reverently expressed his desire. "Lord, please make me a man of means."

"Alright. Leave it to me."

The god had immediately complied. So, he's a god of luck, then? However, it was a little too simple. He couldn't help but be a little incredulous. The man decided that he shouldn't expect much.

Soon, the harvest season arrived, and again, the typhoon came. However, it turned out to be a streak of good luck. The man had finished his harvest just a single day earlier. The man had avoided disaster, and the other villagers had suffered damages both great and small.

This was an opportunity, and everything started to take a turn for the better. The villagers relied on him for finances, and so the man took and lent with a high interest. He'd started to make money. At first, it was only little by little, but depending on the size of the loan...

He told the god, "I should probably say that this is all thanks to you. My fortune continues to grow."

"Of course. That's my power."

"I concede that it is your power. And so, how shall I give thanks?"

"Don't even worry about that sort of thing. But how about this? If you allowed others to worship me as well..."

Although the god had made a suggestion, the man panicked and waved his hands.

"Don't be ridiculous. We can't have that."

"I guess you're right. That might be better. It was like that in the last house I was in, as well."

"I didn't know about that. Did you make them rich, too?"

"It should scarcely need saying, That's what I live for."

The man calmed down, and then began to panic again. He felt assured by the effects of the god's power, but the fact that the previous owners had lost possession of this god concerned him. At that, he moved the figure to from the alcove to a newly built storehouse. This way it wouldn't be stolen or prayed to by the other villagers.

Having hid the figure, the man's fortune grew and grew. The interest on his loans came in one payment after another. Furthermore, he established a monopoly on goods coming into the village. For as you know, a god was a work.

The man prostrated himself before the statue and spoke.
"All is by your good graces. From this tract of land, to the mountain and forest--no matter what, it falls into my grasp. I've started to be called the head of this village."

"I'm also very pleased!" the figure answered with its grinning face.

"How gracious of you. I had no idea that the true powers of a luck god were this wonderful."

"You're welcome, but I think there seems to be a misunderstanding. Although my powers are indeed wonderful, I'm not the kind of luck god you think I am!"

"No need for jokes. This fortune that you've given me--if you're not a god of luck, then what are you?"

"What do you think?"

"I don't know. Still, at any rate, you're a gracious god," the man said with an unchanging smile on his face. The god replied with the same, innocent grin as always.

"I'm a god of poverty. As people suffer, they become impoverished. To see this makes me happier than anything else. However, I've thoroughly tasted and enjoyed my fill, so soon we will part. Even if I wanted to savor it a bit more, the villagers have already hit rock bottom. Momentarily, a group of rioting villagers will close in on you. They'll lay waste to this house, and then probably throw me out by the river with the rest of this junk. Imagining what kind of jerk will pick me up next... It's almost too funny for me to bear."

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Okay, so it's pretty rough. Please leave me some constructive comments if you have the time (strangely worded sections, unclear parts). Thanks!

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Mochitsuki Adventure: The Movie

This is a little footage from back in December. My friend from the cooking class, Mr. Endo, invited me to his house in Sugito at 7AM to make mochi in a shed behind his house. This video includes the mochi making/devouring and a trip to the local agriculture park (or Agri-Park, if you will).


Wednesday, January 13, 2010

I've Been Thinking

... about my doorbell. When ya gonna ring it? When ya gonna ring it?

White Stripes references out of the way, I'd like to talk about something weighing heavily upon me: the fact that I don't know what I want to talk about. I've done roughly 5,000 things since my last post (give or take a thousand), and I really don't want to make a list of it. That's really the impetus behind the long gaps between posts, too. Even if I tell you all these things I've done, I don't have any confidence that it would sufficiently convey anything other than cold, hard fact. And the last thing I want my blog to be is cold and hard. It should be brimming with life, vitality. Just like me.

I'm reading "Yes Man" right now. Yes, the one that the movie is based on. However, while the movie is fiction, the book is nonfiction; and as unbelievable as the events of the book are, they are supposedly true.

It's one of the most inspiring books I've ever read.

I think Danny Wallace is now one of my all-time heroes. He's right above Gandhi and Magritte on the list. Yes, he's above Gandhi (now that I've written that, I'm not sure I mean it. At any rate, I think you get the point).

In short, the book's effectively used it's giant life-affirming highlighter to underline every choice I make. I can feel the weight of every potential opportunity, and so, within reason, I've been pouncing on just about every Yes that floats my way.

I have certain friends (who will remain anonymous) who I've always admired for their ability to seemingly live a life free of regret. How do they do it? For me, Regret can push down on you so hard as to be debilitating.

I think that Yes is the key to seeing the good in every experience, the key that negates regret. When you see the potential opportunity of every action, you realize that opportunities are everywhere, abundant as air. Just say yes to them.

It sort of goes back to my epiphany about human will back in the summer after Freshman year of college. I "conquered boredom" then because it dawned on me that you can do anything you want. The only thing that really limits you is your willpower; and if you really tap into the amazing reservoir of the human spirit, you might find that it's practically bottomless. Will yourself to just do something, because doing something is always a lot more interesting than doing nothing. You might think that's simple, but society makes it so hard for people to realize their potential because it bombards them with a never-ending string of potential excuses. "I'm too fat", "they live too far away", "hasn't been online lately", "well, Idol was on..." For me, when I realized this is when I think I stopped being a child. I wasn't an adult (I'm still not), but I wasn't a child anymore.

I'm still guilty of making excuses, piling on regrets. It's hard to remember how amazing people can be when you can summarize your entire impression of someone based on a Facebook status message. That's why it's good I have this book. When I forget, I can just read this book. And then say yes more.

I suppose this leads me to the conclusion of this little post. Here's a weekend of Yessing.

I said yes to Mr. Ogushi's ramen dinner invitation in Shiraoka. I said yes to getting coffee with him afterwards. It turned into a three and a half hour conversation.

I said yes to going to Mr. Ogushi's takoyaki party the next day. I met a man there who told me an amusing story about how once in America, he said "kyuu-zero-four" at the front desk of a hotel instead of "nine-zero-four" and subsequently had a lot of trouble getting into his room. I also learned how to make expert takoyaki (fried dough balls with octopus in the center).

I said yes to the invitation to attend my friend Koichi's gay choir recital. I said yes to going to Tokyo Tower with Stef and Teresa afterwards. I said yes to Chris' request that I contact him afterward if I was bored.

And then I slipped a little. I was invited to go to Odaiba with Stef, Teresa, and Lucille and I said no. I said, "No, just leave me here at Tokyo Tower. I'll find something". But as I said it, I was worried that I wouldn't find something. I was in Tokyo. Was I really just going to go home early and sleep when I had the day off on Monday? So then, acting quickly, I called Chris and said yes to his invitation to join him at the Hub in Harajuku.

I said yes when Naoko wanted to teach Joe English and I the Japanese version of "Eeny Meeny". I said yes to fish and chips. I said yes to a gin and tonic.

Here's the part I considered leaving out, but I figure if I've already gotten this far in this embarrassing post, I might at well take it all the way to the end.

I said yes to going to a bar with Chris to meet up with Koichi, who happens to be Chris' boyfriend. I said yes to going to a bar in Nichome. I said yes to another Moscow Mule. I said yes to singing Lady Gaga with Koichi at a gay bar. I said yes when Koichi and Chris invited me to sleep on their extra futon after I missed my last train due to too much Yessing.

I said yes to a New Year's nabe (stew-like food) party with all the friends I've made. I said yes to a game of Hoopla. I said yes to all-you-can-drink karaoke. I said yes to having fun.

Today, I said yes to myself. This is stupid, but why not write it. Why not.